» I NEED YOU, ADRIAN

THOUGH MY EDGES MAY BE ROUGH I never feel I'm quite enough It may not seem like very much But I'm yours You healed these scars over time Embraced my soul You loved my mind You're the only angel in my life -------------------- ♥ joel stood in the living room of the house he once shared with qiana and mindlessly stared at the couch. everything was silent. the sound of qiana singing while she cooked or the sounds of noel giggling or crying was no longer heard. everything seemed empty and again joel was left to gather himself and try to figure things out. however, it was just too much for him and he could feel his eyes start to water up as he stood there. shaking his head, joel rubbed his hands over his face and quickly wiped away the tears that threatened to fall before turning around and heading to the front door. he just couldn't be there anymore. he couldn't face being alone... even more alone than onyx had left him. so he left the house and proceeded to take a walk around the city. his red chucks patted softly along the sidewalk and his eyes kept directed to the ground with his hands in his pockets. all he kept thinking was that shit had to get better... that things couldn't keep spiraling downward like this and then he couldn't help but feel like he should've just got on that plane with qiana and ignored that nagging feeling that he should've stayed behind. shaking the thought from his mind, he finally approached main street. everything was mostly dead. there were still some shops open but none of them piqued his interest until he had passed in front of a store in which the neon hue from the "open" sign on the door splashed over the sidewalk and onto his shoes. joel slowly licked his lips and looked up to find out that he was standing in front of lunden's tattoo shop. his brown eyes peered in through the large glass window and it was empty... except for one person who was in the middle of cleaning up his station. he stood there for a moment and watched adrian as he battled with wanting to keep on walking and the urge to go inside. finally, he gave in and pulled open the front door, causing the bells to sound and adrian to look up. joel met his gaze, a small frown tugging at his lips as he heaved a sigh. "hey," he said softly and stepped a little further into the shop.

♥ BRI !

MY HEART IS YOURSAdrian sighed loudly as he began to clean up his station, starting with the tattoo guns that had just been used minutes ago. He had just finished up with his last customer of the day and now he was more than ready to be home in his warm, comfortable apartment where no one bothered him and he bothered no one. It had been the same routine for him almost everyday: going to work, grabbing something to eat, and heading home to either sleep or draw. He had been on his own ever since he had decided to move out of the Ortega household and to be honest, he hadn't talked to any of them in a long ass time. As bad as this may sound, they just hadn't crossed his mind. Joel and Jona both had their own lives to worry about. From what Adrian had heard, Jona had up and left Qiana and Onyx had did the same with Joel. He had also heard that Joel was involved in a terrible drive by shooting and Adrian couldn't help but to feel bad as he thought about how he never once reached out to Joel. To be honest, Adrian was afraid to ever come back in contact with Joel after that day he had put his feelings on the line, only to be shut down.Now he was just considering himself to be alone. There was no Lawrence in his life nor had he ever thought about dating. If anything, he was more focused on moving back to Mexico to be with his mother. He was more than ready for that and there was no one who changed his mind yet about staying. After cleaning his tattoo guns, he began to clean up his station, throwing away the used pair of latex gloves. The sudden sound of the bell chiming at the front door caused Adrian to stop what he was doing and look up, only to feel his heart almost stop in his chest. It was Joel, standing there in the flesh with a look of both confusion and hurt on his face. "Hey," Adrian heard the man utter and he swallowed hard before he looked him in the eye. "Uh...hey, Joel," he said in return, rubbing the back of his neck nervously once Joel had stepped further into the shop. "I was just about to close," he spoke, looking down at the floor.

THOUGH MY EDGES MAY BE ROUGH I never feel I'm quite enough It may not seem like very much But I'm yours You healed these scars over time Embraced my soul You loved my mind You're the only angel in my life -------------------- ♥ joel took a soft breath and chewed at his lower lip. it killed him to see adrian so nervous to be around him. he could remember the times that they were always together, just chillin and having fun and now that was all gone. adrian approached him with his feelings at the wrong time because joel was already involved with someone else but that didn't mean that joel didn't have feelings for him either. he always felt some type of way for adrian and he was always there to protect him from the horrors in his own household. it was difficult to go through things like that with someone and not feel a certain way. however, at the time there wasn't much for joel to do but now... now, joel just missed having him around. he slowly licked his lips and looked at adrian as he looked down, mentioning that he was in the middle of closing the shop. "yea... i-i figured but... uh... look, i didn't come in here for a tattoo or anything. i came in to see you... and... i thought that maybe we could chill or something," he suggested. joel couldn't remember the last time he had stammered so much or felt so nervous. he felt entirely fucking pathetic because this wasn't like him at all. however, after going through the shit he went through recently, he was slightly unraveled. joel just needed someone to be there... he wanted someone around.

♥ BRI !

MY HEART IS YOURSAdrian didn't know what to say. Why all of a sudden was Joel wanting to hang out with him? Was it because he had no one else now and expected Adrian to come crawling back at his feet? In a way, Adrian thought it was all selfish, but he knew he would never tell Joel that. Adrian was too kind of a person to ever put anyone down, but at the same time, he didn't want his heart to be messed with again. Hanging out with Joel would only bring back those feelings that Adrian had tried to suppress for so long. The guy did look pitiful, though, and Adrian had to remember how much Joel had been there for him in the past. Taking a seat, Adrian looked up at Joel. "I guess I can hang around a little longer..." he replied, his voice trailing off some.The more Adrian looked at Joel, the more he felt his heart beat rapidly in his chest. This man in front of him was someone who he spent nights tossing and turning about, all because he had been in love with him. Yes, in love. Adrian used to daydream all the time about what it would be like to be in a relationship with Joel and in his eyes, it would've been more than perfect. But after Adrian had found out about Onyx, all he could do was beat himself up for not telling his feelings to Joel way back. Maybe if he had expressed himself, they would've been together. Just maybe.

THOUGH MY EDGES MAY BE ROUGH I never feel I'm quite enough It may not seem like very much But I'm yours You healed these scars over time Embraced my soul You loved my mind You're the only angel in my life -------------------- ♥ a sense of relief passed over him as adrian slowly sat in the seat. however, his following words really put him at ease and joel took a deep breath before moving over to a nearby chair and sitting across from adrian at another station. he slid his clammy hands over his jeans and then ran a hand over his face before he let his eyes look on at adrian. joel knew there was a reason for the tension between them and he had a good idea it had something to do with onyx. after all, everything had always been good between the two of them until joel had gotten with him. really, he had a good idea why adrian stayed away like he did but joel never confronted him about it. it wasn't something to talk about and he had secretly hoped that adrian would admit to something. having this distance between them killed joel but he could only do so much without adrian's cooperation. letting his eyes fall closed for a moment, he ran the tip of his tongue over his lower lip before opening them again to look at adrian. "how've you been? saw something about you moving... you're not really gonna leave are you, nigga?" he asked before chewing at his bottom lip. despite everything, joel didn't think he could personally stand losing yet another person. adrian was really the only person he had left and joel wanted to make things alright with him. he didn't wanna be like this anymore when it came to him.

♥ BRI !