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 Living in a Lonely World, Private
Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: Feb 23 2012, 11:35 AM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
A mournful look on her face and a bouquet of now wilting roses laid delicately across her lap, Pandora Pilliwickle stared at the opposite wall with eyes devoid of any real emotion. There was a gentle breeze that disturbed her hair slightly, but other than that she moved only to breathe. The fact was, in all honesty, she missed Justus. He might have been his father's son and for all that she protested that she did not care for him, deep down he was the only one she truly did care about. She had no husband, no family who wanted her - only a brother who supported her out of guilt and pity.

Why the station at midnight? Why not? Pandora had no social life and certainly no appointments to keep. She slept when tired, ate when hungry and generally did as she pleased whenever she pleased. It was for this sole reason that she was where she was; possessed with a strange urge to leave her house and for some reason the train station had been her ultimate destination. The roses were those she had purchased earlier with the intention to draw or paint them, the fact they were now looking in far worse condition now than when she had bought them would make no difference to her later. They worked fresh or dead.

She thought she was completely alone, alone to inwardly crumble and torture herself with 'what ifs' and what could have been. As often as she might claim to wish Justus had never been born, deep down she was glad she had him though she was very likely to lose him if she wasn't careful. There was only so much emotional abuse a person could take, even from their own mother.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 294
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Fanny Blackwood
Posted: Mar 23 2012, 06:37 AM


Lower Class
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Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



exquisite clutter
Mary Thomasina [last name forgotten] was the current object of Fanny's obsession since she discovered that the girl bore the same first name as she. She followed 'Tamsin' everywhere she could and, despite the sixteen year old maid's best efforts, was far too persistent for her own good.

. The five year old wouldn't listen to anybody and often would insist on being included which was why, in a manner of speaking, she was at the trainstation at midnight without her mothers knowledge and when little girls really should be in bed. asleep.

. The sixteen year old, and her boyfriend, had snuck out and Fanny had followed them. They'd gone to investigate the 'ghosts at the trainstation and Fanny had followed because she loved the idea. She'd heard that there was a little boy ghost floating around Hogsmeade and she wondered if she could meet him. It was, of course, quite unfortuneate that instead the two had decided tomeet at the trainstation for a clandestine meeting... a meeting which Tamsin had no intention of letting a five year old even witness.

. Fanny stared at a rat which was currently investigating one of the trainstation bins and wondered when her mama or Uncle Cai would turn up to scold her for following Tamsin and then take her home and tuck her in to sleep. She wondered if she could get home herself or if she should just wait for Tamsin. The rat snuffled inside the garbage bin and Fanny took a step backwards a little afraid.

. After a while the rat seemed to lose interest in the garbage can and it poked it's head out it's eyes appearing to glow in the dark and it's pink nose twitching. Fanny took a step backwards and as it moved in her direction she scream and took off bolting further into the trainstation until she tripped over her own feet and tumbled onto the station floor.

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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: Mar 25 2012, 08:02 PM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
The sound of something - or rather, someone as the case was - falling on the cold stone floor, reached Pan's ears and slowly but surely, roused her from her morose thoughts. She gradually turned her head towards where the little girl lay, apathy oozing from her very pores. "Child, why do you lie on the floor?" she asked, her voice flat and monotone as she stared at the small figure.

Pandora had of course heard the scream of the little girl but not batted an eyelash at it for she had rationalized it in her subconscious as the echoes of her most torturously tragic and sad past. At one point, she had had the brightest of futures - intelligence, wealth, social status, virtue, beauty... And then it was all ruined. It was all ruined because of her naivity and his... his smooth, sugar-coated venomous words. It was Justus' fault. His fault for existing. It could have been covered up far easier had he not existed. All these thoughts and more bounced around the inside of her head.

"The floor is such a filthy place to reside..." she murmured to no one in particular.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 194
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

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Fanny Blackwood
Posted: Apr 9 2012, 10:11 AM


Lower Class
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Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



The little girl hadn't hurt herself when she'd fallen over which was a relief, nor had she torn any of her clothes which was even better. Fanny was sure her mother would defineately not be impressed with her if she had done that and the five year old knew that her mother was probably going to be very upset with her once she'd found that she was up and out of bed. Fanny had a bedtime that she was supposed to keep but she'd been annoyed at how much attention her mother was giving to the infants and she didn't like the new people who'd come in to help...so she'd broken the rules even though she knew she shouldn't. She knew it was wrong to follow Tamsin despite the fact that Tamsin was the bestest person in the world. Excepting of course her mama...and miranda... and uncle cai... and the pretty lady Delphinia with the pretty red hair.

She jumped as she heard a voice quite close to her and stared at the curly haired woman. She frowned and realized that she was scared of this woman. This woman who didn't seem quite right. She slowly drew herself to her feet and shook out her skirts. She stared at the woman and whilst her instincts told her to run she didn't.

"There was a rat." She said quite clearly and held up her chin as if that answered everything. She had nothing to be scared of. Nothing bad could happen to her.

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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: Apr 9 2012, 07:45 PM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
The frown on the little girl's tiny, innocent little face puzzled Pandora; what could possibly cause the child to frown at her? No matter, it was too strenuous to figure out the mind of a child. She didn't even really care why the child was at the train station in the middle of the night, she just was. Things happened, she accepted them. It was how she coped with day to day life. Well, to some extent. She might accept some things but otherwise she spent all her energy in regret and resisting the oncoming future.

"A rat? There are always rats... Rats in every corner of life, just waiting to pounce and bring you down to their filthy level... And in your case quite literally..." She spoke as one who had tired of life a long time ago, as though she had resigned herself to discontentment and put up not resistance to it. "Was it a very large and ugly rat? Did it have greasy fur, sharp teeth and beady yellow eyes?" Where she was going with it, she didn't know. Not much was passing through her mind, save for a feeling of exhaustion but not so much of the physical variety.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 203
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

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Fanny Blackwood
Posted: Apr 10 2012, 03:20 AM


Lower Class
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Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



The little girl didn't know what to do. She was all of five but she was able to tell quite quickly how people were supposed to behave and the lady wasn't behaving like she was supposed to at all. She made Fanny really nervous and Fanny didn't like to be nervous of people. The normally very friendly girl was just a little frightened.

She hadn't been frightened at the prospect of ghosts. Ghosts were interesting. Ghosts meant adventures. Ghosts meant excitement. Ghosts didn't equal scary looking ladies with curly hair who spoke as if they weren't really here. She wondered then if perhaps the strange lady was a ghost.

It would make sense. The train station was haunted afterall. The lady was obviously a ghost.

She stared at the woman and felt her mouth go slack. Her first ghost. She had never seen a ghost before.

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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: Apr 11 2012, 02:52 PM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
Pandora's brow creased; the child was gaping at her! Had the child been raised by animals? She might have sunk to the lower class but she had the pride of the upper and had been brought up as such. "What in Merlin's name are you gaping at, little girl?" she demanded abruptly, disliking the look she was getting. How old was the girl anyway? Four? Five? Six? What careless mother or nanny allowed a child to wander so far at such an hour? Clearly this one's nanny. Or mother. Whichever had charge of her.

"Get off the floor, you'll collect dirt down there," she snipped, returning her gaze to where it had been before the small child had disturbed her. "Dirt... At least you can wash off that dirt. Real dirt will last a lifetime..."

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 135
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

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Fanny Blackwood
Posted: Apr 11 2012, 04:01 PM


Lower Class
Group Icon

Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



Fanny's mouth shut with a snap and she darted up from the floor as soon as she realised that the ghost was reprimanding her for being on it. She had forgotten that she was still on it. She pulled at the sleeve of her jacket turning it so it didn't pull on her arm. She was tempted to run. To run there and then back to somebody else and then go home. This lady made her stomach feel unpleasant. She wanted out. Now.

"Sorry." She mumbled and wondered if her mother would forgive her for being rude to a ghost if she ran. She had probably already made her mother mad once tonight... surely this time wouldn't be any different.

She wanted to run and go home and go back to bed and never disobey her mama again. She didn't like it here. Not at all. She managed to control herself though and to hold herself in position. It wasn't time to run just yet...

tag: here | outfit: here | notes: here
made by Emily exclusively for Charming


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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: Apr 20 2012, 05:55 PM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
Good. The girl was off the floor. That was definitely an improvement. She was so shut off from her own feelings that she didn't even feel the slightest of tugs at her heartstrings when the little girl got off the floor and apologized in what was likely to be perceived as a pitiful voice. Pan couldn't complain though, avoiding her own feelings meant she could turn a blind eye to trouble and stress and simply liberate herself. Well, that was the theory but all she was really doing was living in utter denial and in the back of her mind, she knew it.

"Why do you continue to stare at me, child? Have you never seen another human being before or are you a half-wit?" The girl's gaze unnerved her a little if she was honest, she was very rarely looked at and even more uncommonly was she paid attention to. This was unusual and she wasn't used to it, nor was she sure she particularly liked it.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 169
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

user posted image
Fanny Blackwood
Posted: Apr 22 2012, 03:36 PM


Lower Class
Group Icon

Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



She looked down at her feet and pulled them together. She could see how dirty her stocking were from this angle and how dirty her skirts were. Her mama would be angry. She wondered if following a teenager to a haunted trainstation and actually meeting a ghost would count as a spanking offence. Her mother didn't smack her often because it was something she reserved for when Fanny had been particularly bad. She'd probably also get called by her first name.

'Mary Frances Blackwood' Fanny could hear her now. 'You know better. You were being delibrately naughty.'

She ventured another glance at the ghost and bit into her bottom lip with her baby teeth as she decided to answer the ghosts question.

"I have! But.. but I've never seen a ghost before." She looked down again and decided that when she got home she would be a good little girl and not go looking for trouble in trainstations that were mysterious and haunted. Especially at midnight. She'd be a good girl and help the gardener out with the roses and other nice smelling plants. She wouldn't go talking to strange people and above all she wouldn't be out of bed after her bedtime by herself. Next time she went looking for ghosts she'd take somebody with her who wasn't boring or going to leave her by herself. She'd take Uncle Cai or... or... if she was really desperate Sirius. She liked Sirius and they'd already had one adventure together but she wasn't sure whether his parents would let him go ghost hunting. They seemed liked the rich sort who would get annoyed if their son disappeared to go ghost hunting and she didn't want to get Sirius into trouble...besides Sirius was smaller, shorter and younger then her. He couldn't protect her if they came across anything scary. She wanted somebody who knew how to deal with ghosts and could protect her and scare the ghosts away and teach her how.

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made by Emily exclusively for Charming


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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: May 5 2012, 09:35 AM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
Pandora's brow furrowed in a perplexed manner; a ghost? There was no ghost here, save for the ghosts of the past but no actual specters... What was the girl saying? She spent a few moments frowning in thought at the girl before it dawned on her. Did the little child think she was a ghost! Her eyes widened in surprise though why she was surprised when she gave off the impression of a person clinging desperately to the past was a mystery. Well, not so much a mystery - she just wasn't very good at seeing what other people saw when they looked at her.

"And you still have yet to see one, child," she replied shortly, pursing her lips in annoyance. "I am not a ghost but I daresay children who wander train stations at ungodly hours are likely to become them sooner than they might otherwise." She wondered what on earth the girl was doing out and about. Was she homeless? She didn't look homeless. So that meant some irresponsible parent had allowed their child to cause mischief and bother her.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 182
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

user posted image
Fanny Blackwood
Posted: May 6 2012, 06:19 PM


Lower Class
Group Icon

Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



Fanny squeaked. "That not right. You have to be a ghost..." She held out her hand in an imitation of a gesture she'd once seen somebody do to mark off important details.

"You aare at a haunted trainstation at midnight." She said stumbling over her words. She pulled her thumb into her hand so only four fingers were up.

"You..." She trailed off trying to think of more reasons other than you seem very wierd... or you frighten me. She bit her lip and streamed forward.

"There's something about you that doesn't seem right and you're wierd and scary and that means your a ghost so," She said the words as fast as she could not even pausing to take a breath and was shaking by the end of it and leaning away from the woman. She'd been debating on running since she'd first arrived but she knew depending on the woman next reaction she was going to bolt as fast as she could to the stations entrance. She'd find her way home even if she had to wait until their were other more normal people about. She'd said that children who wander train stations at ungodly hours are likely to become ghosts sooner than they might otherwise. that sounded like a threat... like the lady was going to make her a ghost. She quivvered in terror. She was going to run... but she needed to hear what the lady would say in response. Fanny had made a totally valid argument. The ghost had to realise it. The ghost was a ghost.

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Pandora Pilliwickle
Posted: May 15 2012, 09:16 PM


Lower Class Eccentric Painter


Group: Deceased
Posts: 22
Member No.: 821
Joined: 11-January 12



Real love is blind devotion, unquesitoning self humiliation, utter submission
Pandora scowled; it wasn't so much that she was being talked back to by a child but more because she was offended by the notion that she gave off such an impression of being a specter. It was only worsened by the child's continuing insistence and finally her tolerance was breached at 'weird and scary'.

"Were you raised amongst utter ignorance and ill-breeding?" she demanded abruptly, her growing anger apparent despite her voice not increasing in volume. "You are a wicked child! I am no ghost! How ridiculous to even suggest such a notion!" Her jaw-clenched once more and she stared at the girl with an intense dislike that was not so much stemming from the girl's outspokenness but the words that had struck a nerve and the fact that she had been so affected by a little girl. She hated the child now that she thought about it; the little creature represented everything she had lost; her youth, her chance at life and so much more. At least she was not a boy, however. Pan would have had more of an inclination to lose her temper quite violently in that case.

Raising a son when she hated his gender so fiercely for what had become of her had been the hardest of challenges. She foresaw a monster for the boy's future, the same kind of monster as his father. The kind that took advantage and ruined lives and she wanted no part in unleashing such a demon upon the world. However, she still loved him, against her will as it may be and the boy didn't seem to take so much after his father but then again, she was of the belief that the male species were all cunning and able to hide such things easily.

"Leave. Leave me," she snapped sharply after leaving a rather long pause. She wanted to be left to her thoughts as she had been before, only now they were unsettled.

Tag: Fanny Outfit Words: 329
created by kay of caution and sds


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Thanks sooooo much to Soph for the beautiful av & sig! <3

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Fanny Blackwood
Posted: May 16 2012, 02:30 AM


Lower Class
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Group: Elsewhere
Posts: 101
Member No.: 684
Joined: 17-November 11



Fanny's turned and bolted as fast as she could hot little tears pouring down her face as she tried to remember a way out of the trainstation and away from the very scary lady. She wanted to go home and she wanted to go home now. She wanted her Uncle Cai, her mummy or anybody. She tripped over her feet and sniffed and pulled herself to her feet and continued to bolt.

She swore that this was the last time that did something she knew she shouldn't do. She ran as fast as she could. As fast as her legs could carry her. She was almost shaking when she noticed the people standing at the entrance of the trainstation. Tamsin stood there, her hands on her hips with a very displeased look on her face. Her foot tapped but Fanny didn't care. She had never been so glad to see somebody in her life. She threw herself at Tamsin and covered her face in the girls skirts. She could here Tamsin lecture her about moving when she'd been told not (Fanny couldn't remember her telling her not to but that wasn't the point).

"I'm sorry Tamtam..." She said into the girls skirt and heard Tamsims boyfriend chuckle. She looked up to see the final moments of an illicit kiss. She looked away again and found Tamsins hand slip around hers as they started to walk home though Fanny didn't last for too long and had to be carried. She only woke for a moment when Tamsin was forced to come clean to her mother and Fanny knew that she'd probably be scolded severely in the morning but she was just too tired in that particular instant.

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