These Envious Glorious Things, Tag: Noah W.

Date: December 1st, 2011
Location: Evergreen, Indiana
Characters: Noah Weathersby, Devin Moran, Leila (age 6), Connor (age 2)
AU Back Story: Noah and Devin are divorced after two years of marriage. Devin remarried (Shane Moran) and has one child with her new husband.


This was one of the best days but it was also the worst. Shane elected to stay at work with Connor. The last time her husband had seen the man he had threatened to do several things that did not sound pleasant. It was best for all parties that Shane stay at away. This allowed for him to get some father and son alone time that was always needed. Connor loved his Daddy and she knew that as soon as Leila was handed over she'd be taking the little girl back to the garage to see Daddy as well probably with a new picture drawn just for him. Leila Moran made it known that she loved her daddy of four years. She also loved her Papa which was why Devin suffered the drive to go pick up her daughter from the man she looked forward to the least.

Pulling up in front of the house, Devin took a deep breath. It was nicer than the meek little home Shane and her had but Leila was old enough to understand that she had two good homes; one that had everything she could ever want, and one with all the love she could ever need. Normally Devin would honk and Leila would come flouncing out waving goodbye to Noah. But seeing as how Devin hadn't seen her daughter in a little over a week, she figured she could brave the front door step.

It was the agreement in the divorce when it came to custody. Devin would have main custody (thanks to the court) except one weekend a month and every other holiday. This year Thanksgiving was with her father and Christmas would be with Devin and Shane though it seemed that since Connor was born Leila and been spending more holidays with them. To be fair, Devin always gave Noah an extra weekend when that happened.

Devin knew that Shane would be happy to have Leila home. I twas hard with an almost four year old trying to date. But Shane had taken to he little girl right away. It didn't take long before he said they should get married and Devin said yes. A quick trip to the court house and it was done. Shane legally adopted Leila not long after and then they were expecting Connor. Of course telling Noah that Leila was now Leila Moran didn't go so well. Devin was pretty sure that sealed the fate on there being any reconciliation between Noah and Devin and Shane. The only thing they had keeping them together was the little girl she was picking up right now.

The marriage hadn't ended nicely. Luckily Leila was too young to remember the year separation and the fighting. Devin hadn't loved Noah to being with. He was the guy her father had picked out and she had been told for years that this man was going to be her husband. In the end Noah had gotten her pregnant her sophmore year of college and marriage of course followed baby (before it got out she was knocked up). It lasted until Leila was 1 and all hell broke loose. Devin wasn't going to me the mistress to Noah's job nor the wife who let him have another mistress to play house with. The evidence had been condemning once she found the photos that were bought from the newspaper so they wouldn't print.

Ringing the bell, Devin stood already on the defensive.

"MOMMY!" the little girl squealed as she threw open the door after looking like she had run from the back of the house.

"Hey sweetheart. Ready to go home? Daddy's waiting with Connor at the garage so we can all go get pizza."

The less time she had to spend here, the better.

This wasn't how Noah's life was supposed to be going. He wasn't supposed to be panicking because he couldn't find his daughter's favourite pony toy that she had brought along when she had been dropped off at his home for the holiday's. "I promise, papa will find it baby." Noah repeated to Leila, who looked like she was going to cry. He was working on this whole 'being a father' thing. It was something that he hadn't really worked on when him and Leila's mother had been together, and now that he was pretty much left on his own when Leila came to visit - well, it was a learning process for sure. And Leila didn't make it easy, with her stubborn nature, that Noah knew she had gotten from him and Devin.

Devin. Devin Taylor. Or Devin Weathersby, as she was in Noah's head still. He had been pretty much set to marry Devin since the day she had been born. Noah had known from an early age that Devin was the girl that he was going to marry - the girl he was going to fall in love with one day. And he had indeed fallen in love with her - it was ridiculously hard not to love Devin. On his hands and knees and peering under the couch, for the lost 'Sparkles', Noah was reminded of just how many times he had been on his hands and knees, trying to get Devin to stay in their failing marriage. Unlike Noah, Devin never seemed to fall in love with Noah. No matter how hard he had tried, it hadn't been enough for Devin Taylor. She had always wanted more from him - more time, more love, more affection. Noah wasn't used to things being expected of him. He had never been expected to do anything, when he had been younger. Nate had always been the one that had been depended on. Running a hand through his hair, and sitting up, Noah saw that Leila was perched on the couch, watching him look. "It's hide and seek, baby. Sparkles wants you to look for him too!" Noah said, trying to engage Leila. They only spent so much time together, and the older that she got, the more Noah realized he was missing out on. He had missed her first laugh, the first time she had walked. Hell, he had missed the first time she had rode a bike. She had come to him one month, claiming that 'daddy' had taught her to ride a bike, and did 'papa' have a bike she could ride too?

Needless to say, Noah had stewed in his anger for a while. But that anger wasn't going to be disappearing any time. Devin and him had gotten divorced, and she was married again. To 'the bastard' as Noah fondly called Shane. The same bastard who had stole his daughter from him. Noah still remembered when Devin had called to tell him that Leila had been legally adopted by Shane. Something in Noah had snapped. He may not have been the best father he could have been, but Leila was still his daughter. That was something that the bastard and Devin couldn't take away from him. They could take away his only chance at happiness, his chances at getting into Senate before the age of forty, but he would be damned if they were taking his daughter from him too. Restraining himself from swearing under his breath, Noah was once again looking around for 'Sparkles' when Leila climbed onto his back. "Horsey, daddy! Giddy up!" Leila demanded, and Noah complied, crawling around, and carrying a happily laughing Leila on his back. It was when Noah was going to tell Leila that they had to stop playing and get ready for when mommy was going to get there, when the doorbell rang. Instantly, Leila was off his back like a bullet from a gun. Straightening up, he heard Leila's squeal, before wandering over to the door.

"Devin." he nodded to her, as she stood there with their daughter. God they looked alike. Except for her nose. She had her papa's nose. "Come in. I just have to grab her bag, and find Sparkles, and have a word with you." Noah all but demanded, as his eyes scanned the floor for the misplaced toy. In his peripheral vision, he saw a little tuffit of rainbow coloured hair sticking out of a closet door, and with a cry of triumph, he opened the closet, to find Sparkles laying on the ground. "Aha!" he proclaimed, and presented the toy to Leila, who giggled at her papa's theatrics. "Hey sweetheart, can you grab your bag from the kitchen?" Noah asked Leila, who complied, running to the kitchen. Checking the time on his watch, Noah finally looked up at his ex wife. "I want more time with her. She's growing up, and I'm missing it. I'm her father - we need more time together." he said, bluntly, not wasting time on niceties.

Him and Devin had passed the point of politeness a long time ago.

He wasn’t supposed to invite her in. The plan was that he’d have the bag ready by the door they’d say hello, they’d ask the other if there was anything they needed to know about Leila, and then it was the transfer of their daughter herself. There was no inviting in for drinks or to talk or because she wasn’t ready to go. (Devin could clearly remember the earful she got when she didn’t have Leila all packed because Connor was sick and she ran behind). She had a husband to go home to and a brother and sister to reunite. The only thing Devin could hope was that Connor didn’t get curious as to why Leila was gone or why she had two dads and he only had one. There was still time before all that had to be dealt with. And while Connor wouldn’t realize that his mother wasn’t on time, Shane would.

”Papa says Sparkles is playing hide and seek,” Leila informed her mother. Devin just gave a nod of her head. A snide comment was kept back on how Shane never lost Leila’s toys mainly because it took this long for Noah and her to be civil. Their marriage had never been the warmest but there were good moments to it. Devin couldn’t deny there were times she was happy as Mrs. Weathersby and before that when they were dating. But it wasn’t made to last. Especially not when Noah was at work fifty plus hours a week and when he wasn’t there he was with his mistress somewhere under the guise of working. It didn’t take long for Devin to pack her bags with Leila and go. The press had gotten photos and the families had pay them off not to run the photos that were proof of Noah’s affair. Devin herself had spent weeks suffering through his parents and hers beginning her to forgive him and to think of Leila. In the end she had been thinking of Leila. Their daughter didn’t deserve to have to grow up like they did with parents who barely loved one another, a father who was absent, and who cheated on their family.

Just inside the door wondering what he had to talk to her about. Besides setting up what weekend he’d be taking Leila, they didn’t talk outside of lawyers. Leila was off like a shot to get her bag. Something about it Devin didn’t like but she swallowed down whatever it was. “Be quick, Leila. Daddy and Connor are waiting for us so we can go get pizza.” Where Noah had been a nonexistent Father, Shane treated his step-daughter as if she was his. Sometimes Devin joked with him that Leila was the whole reason he married her. He had witnessed most of the little girl’s firsts and there was always that fear that she wouldn’t be like Connor to him without that flesh and blood connection. She was wrong. More so by the fact that Leila had been begging for a little sister and Shane liked to point out that Christmas was coming up. He spoiled her more than anyone.

His request was met with a snort. “Oh really?” She said without thinking. Devin felt like her offer to him of the holiday trade offs was fair enough and more than what the court gave him. “You know more time with her means taking days off, not hiring a babysitter, and not dragging her to the office, right?” Leila had ballet and soccer and t-ball. Noah had paid for a summer of horseback riding lessons and Leila had been begging to go again. Devin had their family schedule down and so did Shane. She was pretty sure Noah was lacking on the responsibility front there. “You didn’t seem too concerned before about missing things,” she grumbled under her breath. Pushing back hair from her face to behind her ear, Devin gave a long, drawn out exhale. “I’ll have to discuss it with Shane. You can’t just change the life she knows because you want it.”

Noah knew that it wasn't normal for him to not be ready for Leila to go, so to minimize the time that he actually spent talking to Devin. He didn't have the time or patience to put up with the only woman who had broke his heart. God, it had killed him when he had heard about her new husband, and the fact that they had a baby together. Noah was sure that Shane was everything Devin had wanted - the Devin he had come to know wasn't going to settle for another loveless marriage. Maybe that was what had hurt him the most. Seeing her happy had been a punch to the gut. He didn't know what he had wanted when they had gotten divorced, but he had sure as hell hoped that she would pine for him. Was it too much to ask for her to stay a little bit in love with him? It would make dealing with her and the Asshole a little easier on Noah's blood pressure. Running a hand through his hair as he waited for Devin to come in, and for Leila to run off and occupy herself for a few moments, Noah found himself staring at his wife ex-wife. She looked happy. Happier than he would have liked.

Noah knew he wasn't blameless. A fool could have seen that their marriage was suffering because of Noah's work schedule, and affairs. Anyone could have seen the way that Devin looked at Noah. It wasn't the look of someone who was happy and secure in their marriage. It was the look of a woman who wasn't in love anymore, and now was seeing what kind of monster her husband could be. For his part, Noah didn't understand - or want to - why Devin didn't just turn a blind eye. His mother knew that his father had cheated on her many times, but she had stood by the elder Weathersby, and in return, Noah's father kept everything quiet. Out of respect for her. Had Devin turned a blind eye to his actions, Noah was sure that something could have been worked out. But she had to go and get all self-righteous about those pictures. Those damn pictures. Noah still remembered the hell that had become his family life when the pictures had come to his father, and Devin had seen them. For all Devin had said about thinking about Leila, and how she deserved more, Noah couldn't help but think that a small part of it was Devin's bruised ego.

And now Devin was breaking down Noah's ego. Gritting his teeth, Noah realized just how much he hated when Leila called the Asshole, Daddy. He remembered the first time he had heard it. He had nearly thrown something, but instead he had smiled at Leila, and quietly seethed, waiting for a moment to call and rant at Devin. There had been a lot of those calls in the beginning of Devin's second marriage. The calls had slowly stopped coming, but now...well now Noah was sure they were going to start again. Rolling his eyes at Devin's reply, Noah crossed his arms across his chest, awaiting a moment to speak. "I'm in a good place right now, and is it so wrong that I want to spend some more time with my daughter?" Noah replied coldly, his eyes narrowed in on her face. "Wasn't that your main complaint, Devin? That I didn't spend time with Leila? I want that to change, and you're not letting me." Hearing her sigh, and mention the Asshole's name, Noah could have punched something. Someone. Someone with Shane's face. But he was older, wiser. More mature, if you will. "Discuss it all you like, but know that I have no problems bringing in the lawyers again. I'm sure he wouldn't like me spending time with Leila, but the fact remains that she is my daughter. Not his."

This was never going to be easy. It hadn’t been easy when she had packed her bags along with Leila’s and left the money and luxury behind. Getting a job hadn’t been easy with a baby to take care of and lawyers to pay. Her grandparents had pretty much fronted the bill and if it wasn’t for them she was sure the situation would have been the opposite with Noah having primary custody. Noah’s attorney couldn’t even get the court to order a stay on her move to Indiana where she then met Shane. She was sure that helped her in the end. A stable two parent household with a mom and dad home every night beat out all the riches in the world when the one who possessed them was an adulterer and gone all the time. Still winning those victories didn’t mean every battle went into the win column. If Shane and she had their way Noah wouldn’t be in Leila’s life. Every time Leila asked why her mother and father weren’t together it was a game of dancing around the issue when all she wanted to say was that Noah was a bad person. But for her daughter, Devin kept her tongue and just said that sometimes older people choose to be apart and remind her that her daddy Shane wouldn’t be around. That usually got her to drop the subject.

“It’s not wrong it’s just too late,” Devin stated simply, her hip popped out and leg locked in a stance of defiance. When he slept with those other women, chose his selfish needs over that of his wife and family, Noah had given up any rights he had in Devin’s opinion. “And you think demanding more time and threatening me is going to magically get you what you want?” If he wanted to bring the lawyers back into it Devin knew Shane would all be too happy to bypass that and tell him to get lost. Either way Devin wasn’t going to let Noah see any more of Leila than the courts demanded of her. He was lucky that he got that much. She was sure that had they pushed for it, Devin could have made it so he never saw his daughter. There were some days she wondered if he even loved his daughter or if he did this just to piss Shane and her off. Even if she believed him there was still so much evidence against him. Piano and dance recitals missed, school pageants that were promised to be attended only to have a little girl disappointed that the crowd was missing one less person for her.

A roll of her eyes and Devin couldn’t believe that Noah was arguing this again. When she told him she was seeing someone as a courtesy he argued this. Then when he was sent a wedding announcement (not an invite) and then again when Devin was pregnant with Shane’s and her son. She wondered if when she got pregnant again, as Shane and she had decided to try for another baby, that Noah would bring up that Shane wasn’t Leila’s father. “He’s the only father she knows and he treats her more like his own child than you ever did. Not once as she ever been an inconvenience to Shane like we were to you.” Sometimes she wished Noah would just go move some foreign country and leave them alone. Their days were so much better when Noah was nowhere near them. “Nothing you do is going to change the fact that Shane is a better father to her.”

Devin wasn't the only one who had to deal with Leila's questions. Noah remembered each and every time that she had asked why mommy and papa weren't together. Everytime she asked, Noah had just smiled and shoke his head, and told Leila that he loved her. It didn't usually deflect the question completely, but it gave Noah enough time to change the subject and never answer Leila. What could he say? That he had screwed up, and her mother was intent on making him pay for the rest of his life? For some reason, he figured it would get back to Devin if he actually said that, and the resulting argument wouldn't be pretty. His stance just as defensive as Devin's, he leaned back on the balls of his feet and resumed crossing his arms across his chest. This was a faceoff between them, and Noah knew that Devin wouldn't be backing down from a fight without at least giving him a piece of her mind. In the back of his head, he had hoped she would be rational and say that he could see his daughter more, but she was insisting on being petty. She obviously thought he hadn't changed, and he felt like snarking back, but he bit his tongue for once. Better she get everything out in the open, before he interrupted her further.

As much as Noah didn't want to admit it, Devin had a compelling case. He had cheated on her andhad been an absentee father (though both of things had happened for good reason). Noah had a feeling that the courts wouldn't see his case the same way as they saw Devin, and he had only himself to blame for that. All the same, there was nothing that money couldn't get, and if he wanted more time with his daughter, he would be able to do something to get that time with her. Everybody had a price, even Devin, in her self righteousness. "What else am I supposed to do, Devin? You wouldn't take me seriously if I asked nicely, and sent you flowers for it, would you?" He knew the answer. Devin wasn't going to take him seriously in his demand request to see his daughter more often. "Because if that's how I'm going to see my daughter, I'll do it. I love her too Devin, and you know that." Devin could doubt his intentions all he wanted, but the fact remained that Leila was his flesh and blood, and if there was something that Noah did, it was look after his own. He might not have looked after Leila before, but he had matured. It was possible for people to change, and he was changing. While he hadn't exactly embarked on a new and serious relationship since Devin, he did miss that little sense of family that he had felt coming home after work. In the early days, it had been exciting for Noah to get home and see his wife.

Devin had found it easy to move on apparently, but Noah was still stuck. He wouldn't admit it to anyone, let alone himself, but he was still hung up on Devin. Or the idea of her, and a family. It was why Shane irked him so much. In Noah's head, Shane had ruined any chance of reconciliation, and any chance that Noah had thought he had regarding Devin. Snorting at her depiction of the asshole, Noah shook his head. "Ever think the reason that he's a better father to her is that he has more time with her, Devin?" Shaking his head once more, he shifted his position. Time to suck up his pride a little bit. He genuinely wanted to spend more time with his daughter, and if he had to concede some things, he would do it. "Can we leave the past in the past? I love my daughter Devin, and the important thing here is that I want to work on my relationship with her. I'm not trying to take her away from you, or from Shane, as much as I would love to. I want to get to know my daughter before it's too late."

“I know that Leila loves you and that’s the only reason you see her at all.” If Devin had her way, Leila would never have to float between homes and know Shane as her one and only father. But Leila loved spending time with Noah and so she put some of her pride on the shelf for the benefit of her daughter. One day when Leila was old enough she’d know that truth. For now though she could enjoy the time she got with Noah and that was it. “You? Flowers? The day you buy any woman flowers is the day hell has frozen over.” Devin couldn’t even recall a time Noah had gotten her flowers when they were dating let alone when they were married. When Leila was born it was the last straw. Not only was he having an affair but he was having a second one with his work and cell phone when the best thing that had ever happened to them entered the world. It was in that moment when he didn’t come to the hospital with a bouquet begging to see his child that Devin knew the end of their marriage was there. Now Leila would have the family that Noah and her couldn’t give together; too bad he was still a part of the picture.

Another snorted laugh and Devin shook her head at what Noah was saying. To begin with they had the two worst examples for fathers in the world. But Noah lacked something that Shane had. Noah looked at Leila like she was property. Their daughter was something to fight over and possess. He was too selfish to be a father. Shane though had taken Leila in as his own when Devin told him that she had a daughter. It was one of the reasons she fell in love with him. Now they had another baby that was theirs and he loved both his step-daughter and his son equally. Devin believed that Noah could ever love anything more than he loved himself. “Maybe he’s a better father because he’s a better man than you ever could be.” Yes she was still bitter. And yes her life was going wonderful with Shane and she loved him but a part of her still held onto that betrayal of her first husband cheating on her. There was a trust and maybe if they had divorced just because they realized they weren’t in love with one another.

“I don’t trust you.” It was as simple as that. Noah couldn’t be trusted with their daughter. Court supervised visits added onto the weekends he got, maybe. But not more time on his own. Definitely not over night. “Leila, hurry up bug!” Devin yelled around the corner urging their daughter to move a little quicker. “That right there… about taking her away from us… that is why you won’t get more time with her. Ever.” Leila was not going to end up like her with a father who didn’t care and living the life that was planned for her instead of living her own

Devin had a few fair points. Noah didn't send women flowers. It was overdone, and stupid. If a man truly cared, then there were much more effective ways of showing their love, rather than buying them something that would die within days. Most people were surprised when they learned Noah wasn't a flower-sender. He supposed he didn't blame them. It did seem like something he would do - more out of sheer laziness, than actual caring. "I'd make an exception for you." he remarked, knowing just as well as she did, that he was lying. If he hadn't come to the hospital on the day Leila had been born with flowers, and some ugly balloons, he sure as hell wasn't going to start now. To be completely honest, he didn't remember the day that she was born all too clearly. For the average person, it was supposed to be of joy, but for Noah, it had been the day when he had traded too many yen to dollar, and had to cover his tracks. He had been at work till late, and had figured he would be better off going to the hospital the next morning. Devin had had people who cared about her there, right? Why crowd her? It just seemed ridiculous for him to be there at the moment where mother and child were supposed to be bonding. Clearly, Devin hadn't seen it the same way, but at that point, it had seemed normal to be fighting with Devin.

Why would a baby change anything? That had been Noah's mindset, and it still was. How did having Leila change the fact that Devin's heart hadn't been in the marriage? Granted, neither had Noah's (for the first little while, and then the middle), but at least, near the end of the marriage, Noah had made a last ditch effort. It had been a little half-hearted, but he had known that Devin wasn't going to come back. Why exert more effort to bring them back together, when it was easier to just let go? Standing here now, he regretted not putting in the effort, because frankly, being divorced was harder than being married to Devin. At least in the marriage, Noah had a relatively free reign, and was able to call the shots. Here and now? Devin was calling the shots, and Noah hated it. Detested the fact that he had to answer to the woman he had let furthest into his heart. "I think it's a matter of perception. Leila seems to like me at least." Noah replied, keeping a lid on the snarky comments he wanted to make about Shane the bastard.

Hearing Devin yell for Leila, Noah felt a little satisfaction. So she felt uncomfortable, did she? Well, point one for Noah. "Charming as ever." he replied, waiting for Leila to come running back, toting her backpack, and a few random things in her hands. 'All ready, mommy!' she declared, before turning to Noah, and throwing her arms up, demanding to be picked up. 'Up! Up!' The first genuine smile on his face since his and Devin's conversation had begun, Noah picked Leila up, and tossed her up and down a few times, much to her delight. "Bye baby, papa loves you, okay?" Nodding and giggling, Leila wiggled a little bit in his arms, wanting to be on the ground again. "I'll be in contact." he said to Devin, the smile gone from his face, and replaced with his normal smirk.