"Bit of a mess."

Cinder Morrow the brawler stuck her head through what had previously been a front window of the NUN station. The plate glass had been completely blown out by the force of some previous attack. Cinder glanced at the jagged fragments of glass that still stuck out out of the window's frame, deemed it safe enough, and stepped through into the disaster zone of the front lobby. Roxy the hellcat leapt through the broken window just after her, enjoying the crunch of shattered glass under her claws.

The Overlord meant to simply shove the front doors open with his shoulder, but the portals screeched on their devistated hinges and fell right off. He watched, nonplussed, as the empty frames -- the doors had once contained glass as well -- clattered noisily to the floor. Shrugging, Ixos stepped over them, and cast a surveying glance around the lobby.

"Goes to show how well those nuns are taking care of things," he commented as he bared a full foot of his katzbalger sword. The Overlord flicked his cigarette to the tiles and crushed it under the toe of his boot.

Cinder leaned over the front counter, and scowled when she found nothing golden or overly shiny to claim as her own. "Seems like somebody got here before us."

"Or a whole bunch of somebodies," Roxy suggested from atop the arm of a chair that had suffered a wide gash and the loss of most of its stuffing.

"Let's go beat them up," the brawler grinned.

-----+

Overlord Ixos Davrell: 130 HP
Brawler [F]: 60 HP
Hellcat: 30 HP
Prinny: 20 HP

[Bumpeth.]

[Dropkick BUUUUUUUUMP!]

"Well... well... well it seems we have a few bugs here don't we?" The heavy female German voice came from one of the rooms. Like ants protecting their colony, it seems the nuns are ready to protect... They aim their pistols at Ixos, that same lady saying "Don't you know its illegal to Smoke?"



Overlord Ixos Davrell: 130 HP, 25 MP
Brawler [F]: 60 HP, 9 MP
Hellcat: 30 HP
Prinny: 20 HP

NUN GunnerA: 50 HP, 10 MP
NUN GunnerB: 50 HP, 10 MP
NUN GunnerC: 50 HP, 10 MP
NUN GunnerD: 50 HP, 10 MP

BATTLE 1! IXOS SUPER FUN HAPPY FIGHTING VARIETY HOUR!
GO!

[Crappiest post ever attack GO!]

“Nuns, my ass,” Ixos said boredly, crossing his arms. “Aren’t you idiots supposed to be peace-love-and-rainbows tree-huggers? Get back to your chapel and quake in your little booties already.”

“That’s why they got their butts handed to them,” Cinder said as she rose from the crouch she had assumed to check under the counter. She cracked her knuckles, and every bone in her hand seemed to settle into place with a loud, frightening rattling. Her grin was downright devious.

A second before Ixos and Cinder could launch themselves at the armed nuns, Roxy and Leroy went to work on some kind of silent agreement. The hellcat spun through the group of gunners like a clawed dervish with a snarl in her throat, and Leroy hacked at the knees of one of the other nuns with a dagger that he had produced from the basket at his front, yowling like he had gone insane.

Right behind the first wave was Cinder, who turned out to be just a step faster than her Overlord. Her bony fist swung back in a mighty arc and shot down toward the gunner that the others had been picking on. Ixos’s blade swung just above her head on a well-placed path, darting towards the face of one of the other nuns. Cinder dodged aside to let him through, and Ixos bulled into the gunner despite the gun she held. His sword carved two fast circles, one at chest height, the other down along the waistline.

Ixos:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerA (20 NORMAL damage)
2. Attack @ NUN GunnerA (20 NORMAL damage)
3. Attack @ NUN GunnerA (20 NORMAL damage)

Brawler [F]:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerB (15 NORMAL damage)

Hellcat:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerB (30 NORMAL damage)

Prinny:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerB (5 NORMAL damage)

"You're thinking of hippies, loser!" the loud-mouthed NUN barked, hiding behind an overturned file cabinet. As two went down in the chaos, she took a glance at her remaining ally, who was firing sporadically at her opponents. One shot managed to hit Cinder, perhaps simply through luck. "You're being pretty useless right now. Cover me while I taze their hides," she instructed the security officer, running out with a buzzing device in one hand. With a powerful motion, she jabbed the device into Ixos, sending surges of electricity through his body.

Overlord Ixos Davrell: 120 HP, 25 MP (paralyzed)
Brawler [F]: 45 HP, 9 MP
Hellcat: 30 HP
Prinny: 20 HP

NUN GunnerA: DESTROYED
NUN GunnerB: DESTROYED
NUN GunnerC: 50 HP, 10 MP
NUN GunnerD: 50 HP, 5 MP

As Ixos scrambled back up, his brain still sizzling between his ears, he distinctly heard Cinder laughing. Her shoulder was a mass of blood, but still ...

"Hahahahahaaaaaaa! Nice shot, lady! Restraining orderrrrr!"

With movements that were jerky and sporadic, Ixos retrieved the sword that he had dropped when the nun-hippy had hit him with the taser. As soon as he had it in his hand, he was rushing at Cinder, intent on chopping her into little bloody bits. Roxy leapt onto her back, digging in her claws, and Leroy grabbed hold of the Overlord's leg. Cinder's mocking laugh continued, although she immediately started to backpedal to keep herself away from that sword.

"Dood!" Leroy shouted, as if Ixos would be otherwise unable to hear him through his homicidal haze. "You can't go around killing your own doods, Mr. Overlord, dood! There are doods right there that we doods need to take care of, dood --"

"Shut up!" Ixos snarled, and kicked Leroy off his leg and towards the two remaining nuns. He promply exploded on impact.

The shock of the blast caused Roxy to squeak, Ixos to stop cold, and Cinder to stop laughing. The flames fell away and smoke burst outwards like a thick mist from the place where Leroy had detonated.

"Whoops," said the Overlord, cowed.

While he was distracted, Cinder dashed around him and leapt towards the spot in the smoke where she imagined the two nuns were. Instead of forcing her injured arm into action, she just landed, squared up, and aimed a forceful kick at a shadowy shape a few feet away. Roxy stayed latched to Ixos's back, staring emptily at the spot where Leroy had vanished.

"You mind?" Ixos said. "I think you're going to leave scars."

"Sorry," Roxy yelped, and hopped clear as another taser-induced spasm shot through the Overlord's muscles.

The smoke was quickly clearing now. Roxy lunged in just behind Cinder, using the brawler's head as a springboard to leap up, over, and descend like a clawed comet on the face of one of the nuns. A second later Ixos had joined the party, too, opening with a vicious thrust into the nun's midsection. Cinder snickered quite loudly, and was quick enough to duck the avenging fist that flew in her direction. The very dark look that the Overlord gave her told her that she would pay for it at a later time. The brawler darted away, and Ixos converted his anger into a sweep at the nun's chest.

Ixos:
1. Throw Prinny @ NunGunnerD (80 NORMAL damage)
2. Attack @ NUN GunnerC (20 NORMAL damage)
3. Attack @ NUN GunnerC (20 NORMAL damage)

Brawler [F]:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerC (15 NORMAL damage)

Hellcat:
1. Attack @ NUN GunnerC (30 NORMAL damage)

Prinny:
1. Get tossed @ NunGunnerD (80 NORMAL damage)

Though the nun swore and cursed God and basically did everything that doesn't befit a nun to do in times of crisis, the two were unable to escape the many various slashes and explosions of Ixos' attacks, and were obliterated. Ixos was left victorious, but with unsightly claw marks on his favorite jacket.

Overlord Ixos Davrell: 120 HP, 25 MP (paralyzed)
Brawler [F]: 45 HP, 9 MP
Hellcat: 30 HP
Prinny: DESTROYED

NUN GunnerA: DESTROYED
NUN GunnerB: DESTROYED
NUN GunnerC: DESTROYED
NUN GunnerD: DESTROYED

--STAGE 1 CLEAR!--

GET: 200 HL, 65 EXP

Bonus: ((+30 EXP))

"Isn't God just the greatest?" Ixos said with a grin. Then he spat on the corpse of the nun that had been last to fall. Cinder kicked distractedly at the ribcage of another.

"I hate this place."

"Yeah, me too. More trouble than it's worth."

Roxy seemed quite relieved at this prospect, and reached underneath her leopard pelt for the walkie-talkie. The brawler stared hard at Ixos.

"Did you just ..."

"What?" he snapped back, lighting a cigarette.

"Did you just agree with me?"

"No, I didn't."

Cinder stuck her tongue out at him. Ixos chose to ignore her.

A moment later, the entire blown-out plate-glass wall was filmed over by a delicate layer of white light. It grew in strength until the light-wall seemed almost solid. The three walked into it and vanished from the station.

[Leaving. Bonus claimed.]