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Posted: Feb 26 2006, 12:25 PM
Shocked Woona is Shocked
Group: Super Members
Member No.: 18
Joined: 18-January 05
Rook vs Gamma Ray! Dam's challenge to the Legion! And MORE, on Lion's Den 3! But first, War Cries...
Up first, Mississippi Goddamn. As in, goddamn, accents in wrestling almost always suck.
And holy cow, we may have hit the 'almost'! Up against one of the Gunslingers, Goddamn nails his debut promo, coming across as just an ornery asskicker, and telling the Gunslinger that he's a smart man, but he should worry about Goddamn, a man too dumb to give up. (8/10.) We all know I love the comedy from Rook and Gamma, but that is the best straight promo I've seen in the fed. Just rewatched it to check, and it's awesome second time around as well.
Next, Danny Daniels. Who cracks me up by quoting the Joker (the song, not the Batman character!) to start off with, then cuts an extremely short promo about his next opponent, who's apparently Thomas Hayden Church. I'm guessing it's a witty play on words, but I'll have to wait until I've seen who he's fighting to see if it works well or not. (5/10.) Not bad, too short to be really good.
And now for Daniels' opponent... TCS!! TCS!! Holy moses, it's Tobias Chapel Smith! SWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTTT. The only other exception I can think of to the accents sucking rule is here! If Daniels is watching, Smith just scared the hell outta him. (7/10.) Slightly preferred Goddamn's, but this is another excellent promo.
Brief fluff piece for another new signing, 'Mr Bollywood' Ravi Kapoor. Not one to rate, but has me interested.
Legion respond to Dam's challenge. Brimstone cuts a really good promo which manages to put Dam over as well as the Legion, then we go to NightDruid setting Dam's car on fire. Ugh. (6/10.) I guess it's a step up from the two teams brawling, but I was definitely much higher on the Brimstone bit.
Dam sees the footage, and responds. Average, not up to his on-card work. (6/10.) Scrapes 6 due to having the sense not to discuss his plan on camera, score one for an actual intelligent face!
Lions' Den next...
Start off with Rook promo in his gym. (Pre-taped from 2 days ago.) Pretty solid modest babyface interview, then Gamma Ray attacks, blasting him with the Gamma Cannon! (7/10.) As I've said, I'm less keen on backstage attacks and stuff than a lot of people, preferring to keep confronations to the ring unless it's really heated. Still, this is definitely well on the way to huge heat, works pretty well. Rook vs Ray in doubt...
Joe Steel cuts very brief promo. I'm not rating anything under 30 seconds, but nice to know he can speak.
Steel squashes Roland James. (*) Move along, nothing to see here folks. Does its job well enough, I guess.
Mississippi vs Eddie up next. Pretty decent, with Mississippi's superior technical skill being plugged by the announcers. Comedy as Eddie screws up a Russian legsweep, failing to take Goddamn down with him. Bubba buster facedriver finishes it for Miss. (**) Extended squash to be honest, but Goddamn looks hugely impressive.
Third match, the ritual sacrifice of Danny Daniels. Okay, even *I* wasn't expecting it to be that fast. Heart punch kills the match off in about 2 minutes. (*) Can't really give anything else to a match that short, but who cares about the rating? This was all about shooting TCS in, and did it pretty impressively.
Gamma Ray vs Rook is off, as Rook's in hospital - BOOOOOOOOOOO. White suspends Ray until Rook recovers, despite Ray's protests that any moron in a Gamma Ray suit could've beaten Rook up.
Main event, Dam vs the Legion in a handicap match. Dam starts off by attacking Brimstone from behind, pummeling him into the corner until Brim gets a low blow. Druid tags in and the expected double teaming starts as they trap Dam in their corner. Druid and Dam spill to the outside, where Dam regains control, ramming Druid into the ringpost then sending him to the steel stairs with an Irish whip. Dam wants Brimstone, and he tosses Druid to the corner to make the tag. Good heart, no brains. Brim dominates Dam before tagging ND back in. Druid goes for a Lights Out... but Dam reverses, getting the Dam Builder! Brimstone saves, Smelly DDT, and Druid gets the 3 count on the second try. (** 1/2)
Legion go for post-match attack... lights go off... and we're out?! Weird, but will get people watching next week to see what happened, I guess.
Top three performers
1. Mississippi Goddamn - justified the hype in his promo by looking hugely impressive in beating Eddie easily.
2. Tobias Chapel Smith - sure, twas about one move, but WHAT a damn move. Nearly killing someone with a heart punch is impact.
3. Dam - brave fight to keep the main interesting.
Match of the night
Dam vs Legion - Only really competitive match, but worth watching.