TSUNAMItsunami.

[Tweety]

hi, it would be really nice to be able to fall in love all proper-like, wouldn't you say?

you know, maybe i'm just one of those people who are never satisfied. maybe "the grass is greener on the other side" has been carved all over my insides, all over the back of my eyes and maybe i'm blind. maybe i'm wasting my time.

someone once told me that it was wrong to want something that i knew was impossible. i know it's true, i just try so hard to forget. i remember now.

so! i mean, things are good. i'm still alive and my dinner was wonderfulllllllllllll. i'm warm and safe and my bed is comfy and woooo i have a week's break!! lmao things are really great and i just realized how hard it is to type when you're trying not to choke up

I Hate DRAMA it has no bloody point to it

screw this. if only i couldn't hold my alcohol. hahahaha if only it would even ACHIEVE anything cause it won't in the end it all comes back like c o a l s ddddddddropping from the sky!!!!!!

sooooooooooo what to do? i'll probably end up putting my mask back on because i'm a fucking coward, and my logic says DON'T throw everything away for Love.

[Tweety]

i feel
So. Much. to the point where i can't think but at the same time
i think
So. Much. to the point where my thoughts go full circle.

it's not easy and yeah. you make perfect sense. you really, really do and but what if to live, you run the risk of having to kill? then again, there's risk in everything and a risk is only a risk because it's not definiteMAYBE i think too much. but God what the hell, stephen, it's insane cause i just... you know. you know how it is. you're asking me to defy logic. again. and if livi - i don't even know anymore.

i sometimes look at myself and wish i was a movie but i'm not a script. we've all been told that to follow our heart is our best chance for a happy ending but what if it's not? if the human heart deceives, to follow it is one of the most dangerous things one can do. movies end with kisses, some with death, but there's always a line between what one should have done and what one should not have done. if i'm messed up in the present, i can't live for now, because right now i don't know who i am. i can't organize my wants and i can't grid all of my feelings and frankly, i don't know if i want to. i'd risk it all, but it's so much easier said than done because i'm not brave, like the millions of people who say they are.

to live a glorious life, you need a reason and purpose.
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii... yeah.

SO. i'm officially screwed up but the sun's shining.
one day, i'll sort it out.
for now, all i'll do is feel.
love.
loveloveloveLovelovelove.

[Tweety]

it's okay.

relax.

there we go.

[Tweety]

let's play a game, boys and girls.

who am i?

i will wait until summer turns to winter, if it meant that you could breathe.
i will give you all my water, though we both thirst.
i will rejoice when all the world calls you beautiful.
i will not place myself above you, for you are a part of me, and i, a part of you.
i will hold you, though you bruise me.
i will close my eyes and see you, though you harrow with words.
i will give you my heart, for all the times you have wronged me.
and all these things, i do for you, and not myself.
i am truth, in the form of breathless beauty, in the form of raw flesh and blood. i am truth though it hurts you, i am truth though it makes you cry.
i will protect you.
i will scream out hope.
i will keep going. i will keep going.
i have hope
i have faith
and i surpass them both.
i stand alone, apart from romance, apart from attraction, apart from desire, apart from safety and security.
i will not make you stay, if you wish to go.
but i? i will stay, to see you fly.
i am not here because of what you do for me - i am here because i see in you, a miracle.
i am memory that leaves you free, for i am freedom.
i am sacrifice.
i am beyond death.
i am eternity.

i am love.
in its purest form, i am love.
in its strongest form, i am love.
i am love.

[Tweety]

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAAHHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[Tweety]

screw you. you are the only guy who can make me hate you to the point where i love you to death.

*

well. i'm still waiting to be roa inspired. i'm sitting here in some oversized yellow jumper and my hair can't decide whether or not it is curly or just messy and i passed out yesterday in my jeans. i'll probably have pizza leftovers from last night and i'm meant to start studying for english & philosophy but it's waaaaaay too early -- it's not even 8am yet. i really just want to write though; about what, i don't know. and you, yeah, i dreamt of you last night and you keep me in this perpetual haze that's clearer than anything else i've seen before. at this rate, i don't think either of us will ever grow up, and when you come, you can sit beside me and watch my world explode.

i told you i had three wishes -- i meant the first. believe me, i meant that first one with all my heart.

i want coffee but what i really want is a watermelon shake but in truth, i just want some orange juice. not that disgusting sour kind, no. the one that tastes like it was made for humans :]. and then i want to pack my bags and head north.

mornings like this -- still, quiet, alone, loved -- they remind me that life is beautiful, for want of better words.

haha. i've always liked that movie.